MilSpouse Appreciation Day - Blog Hop 2012

Welcome to Our Crazy Life! 

I am Athena, mom to six kiddos and wife to one Soldier - who has recently returned from his second extended vacation to the Middle East (courtesy of the U.S. Army). 

The Soldier with his Army brats

The Soldier and I have been married for almost 20 years. We have one college girl, one high-schooler, one in junior high, two in grade school and one preschooler. We stay pretty busy between sports, dance, 4H and everything else. 

It's a crazy life, but I love it.  

I am a writer (writer just sounds so much better than facebook junkie). I just wish I had more time to do so. I may have to give up housework to devote more time to it. 

Okay, so I am not really a housework kind of girl - there are more important things in life.   

Some of my ramblings... 

How to Help a Mom During Deployment

Building Community - Army Style

Beating the Deployment Blues

I would love to know what you think! 

I live love to read. Most of my blog posts (if I am not griping about deployment) are devoted to free ebooks for Kindle. I will read two to three books a week, so I am saving the Soldier a pretty penny by not buying any. Maybe I can convince him to let me spend it on jewelry instead... 

My latest free book post

BBC 100 Book Challenge
(make sure to double check prices as they change frequently!)

I do a book review from time to time (anything for free books!) and host an occasional giveaway. If you want to be notified when the giveaways are up or when a new free book is posted, feel free to like Our Crazy Life on facebook (it also helps my self esteem to have people like me...). 

My biggest passion is volunteering for Mothers of Preschoolers (MOPS). I can't even begin to tell you what a difference getting involved with a group of moms - who are experiencing the same things I am - did for me. I now have friends all over the world thanks to MOPS. Plus, I get to travel (sans kids) a couple of times of year for training and girl time. 

And yes, we have groups especially for Military moms that meet on installations all over the world! If you are a mommy, you need mommy time and MOPS can help! 

Note: If you are a mom, come back tomorrow for my latest giveaway -  a copy of "Mom Connection" with a bag of goodies - just in time for Mother's Day!

I have had a blast since I started blogging and have met several wonderful women and enjoy following their adventures in this crazy world we call Military life. When I need a laugh or a little perspective I check out Witty Little Secret (trust me, you will LOVE her), Household 6 Diva or Riding the Roller Coaster. 

I know what you are thinking, this is getting a little long for an introduction ;0)  

Anyway, I love to chat and would love to get you know you! I spend way too much time on facebook so come over and say hello.

And don't forget to link up!

  

Love, 

"The Husband Project" Especially for Military Wives

Are you looking for ways to better connect with your Soldier/Sailor/Airman/Marine? 

Join us for an online book study of The Husband Project by Kathi Lipp. 

Is your hubby deployed? We have special ideas just for you! 

We even have tons of fabulous prizes to give away each day.

Get ready for:
•29 Days of focusing on your husband
•20 Different Authors offering advice and practical tips
•Over 100 books, gifts and goodies as giveaways
•A whole lot of people praying for you and your man 

Official kickoff on October 10th!   

You won't want to miss it! Get ready for the project:

 
-Get your own copy of "The Husband Project". While you don’t need the book to join in the fun,  it certainly will give you great ideas and inspiration when you feel like giving up!

• You can order it from Kathi's site (use the code milmops for a special discount) 
• Amazon (I got mine on Kindle for $9.87)
• Local bookstore (and I’ve heard from several women that they are available on bases around the world.)

-Sign up for the blog and receive updates as we count down to launching the project.

-Find a couple of friends to hold you accountable. You are going to be much more successful if you team up with a friend or two to cheer you on. Besides, everything is better with a friend!

-Let your friends know! This book club is open to everyone, but is especially geared to all military wives and those women serving in the military – whether they are a part of MOPS or not. We want to be an encouragement to every wife.

I can't wait to get started! 

Love,

MilSpouse Friday Fill-In and MilSpouse Weekly Round Up

In case you were worried after last Friday's post, I would like to let you know that I am doing much better now - at least mentally.

Deployments suck and I can't even begin to list all the ways that they mess things up. I am very proud of my husband and what he does, but that doesn't make it any easier to have him gone for so long.

Thanks for your prayers and don't forget to reach out to others going through this. It is nice to know that people care.

Need ideas to help someone going through a deployment? Click here to get started.

If you are here for the free Kindle books, click here for my latest list. 

If you haven't entered to win a copy of Patrica Hickman's The Pirate Queen yet, hurry over here before the contest ends tonight (Friday, January 21st, 2011).

It is Friday again and that means Wifey is hosting MilSpouse Friday Fill-In. Come on over and join in the fun at Wife of a Sailor!

Now for this week’s questions! 

1. What do you usually want to know about someone when meeting them for the first time?
   
   Are they for real? I don't like fake people...
   
   
2. Would you rather know everything about your spouse, or be regularly surprised?
   
   I like surprises, but after 18 years it would take a lot to surprise me!
   
   
3. If you could live in one city for the rest of your life, where would you live?
   
   New Orleans. I love it there! We lived there about 12 years ago and I cried when we left. It is such a special place and I would love to be there. (See pix from my last trip to this beautiful city here. It will make you want to break out the Harry Connick Jr.)     
   
   
4. When you go out of town, what one material thing do you ALWAYS take?
   
   My Kindle :) It has my books & music on it - two of my very favorite things. I love it and especially love getting free books for it.
   
   
5. Using no more than 10 nouns, and ONLY nouns, describe yourself.
   
   Daughter, sister, wife, mother, writer, GeorgiaPeach, MilSpouse, friend, volunteer, addict (books only! LOL)

This week's MilSpouse Round Up is hosted by Singing Through the Rain. Come over and join us :)

Have a great weekend!

Love,

MilSpouse Friday Fill-in #9

Head on over to Wife of a Sailor to join in on the fun!

1.If you could be a fugitive from the law for whatever reason, what would your crime be?  (from It's a Hooah Life)

I am so not a criminal mastermind. If I ever was a fugitive it would be for something stupid like tp-ing the LTs car or something...

2.How long do you think you will be a military family? (from Julie the Army Wife)

Until we die... Seriously, I will probably be one of those old ladies in the commissary that can't reach the top shelf. I promise to not have the blue hair.


3.What’s your favorite recipe? (from Keep Calm and Soldier On)

Irish Oatmeal Soda Bread (however, the 14yo and I have changed it a bit from the original). We eat a lot of it at our house throughout the year. You must have Irish Butter (costs an arm and leg, even at the commissary) on it and enjoy it hot from the oven!

4.What would you want your last five words to be when you leave this life? (from My Goal is Simple)

I did what I could. (See She Did What She Could (SDWSC): Five Words of Jesus That Will Change Your Life)

5.Where do you hope to retire? (from Pennies from Heaven)

I have always wanted to go back to Seattle and get a condo close to Pike Place Market. If we have $ (which I am sure will have all gone to six different universities by then), I would love to go to Ireland. I think Mark may have other plans though and after our trip to Disney World, I think I better start mentally preparing for the heat and humidity now.

Happy Friday!

My MomSense Magazine Article

I am back from our family vacation to Disney and MOPS Convention and I promise an update as soon as I recover ;0) 

However, I wanted to take a minute to share my article that was in the July/August issue of MomSense Magazine.

There are so many families experiencing deployments, so please pass it on to friends, family and your MOPS group, to give them a list of practical ways to help. I know that pride can get in the way of asking, so I think forwarding them an article is an easy way to start! Remember that you are not alone.

How to Help a Mom During Deployment

Love always,

Army Wife Network - Building Community - Army Style - Jan 2010

I think one of the hardest things about being an Army Wife is the constant change. New Post, new community, new set of friends… We constantly have to start over where ever Uncle Sam sends us. It means stepping out into the uncomfortable and making that connection with someone. Attending Chapel (or a local church), signing up for a class, or going to an FRG meeting…

I have a friend that says “bloom where you’re planted” and even though I laugh when I hear it, she is right. We need community, maybe even more than the civilian world. We need someone that we can call at 4 am when we get that phone call with a bad connection and then our Soldier doesn’t call back. Someone who doesn’t gripe about her husband going hunting and being away for a weekend when yours has been gone for 15 months! Someone who gets the struggles and fears (and yes, even the joys) of military life.

I will admit I like to watch “Army Wives” on Lifetime. I know it is not realistic. No, the Army will not send your Soldier to recruiting school just because he is set to deploy and you don’t want him to go. Nor will they send him home from the Sandbox for several weeks to work on your ‘marriage issues’. And it drives my husband crazy that there is always at least one that can’t get his beret on straight. However, I love how that groups is always there for each other. Good and bad times. That is community.

For me, it was MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers). I knew that I had something in common with all the other women in the room – we were all moms. Even if there wasn’t another Army Wife for miles (we are few and far between in this Air Force town!), I knew I could have a conversation with someone who could complete a full sentence. And boy, did I need adult conversation!

The relationships that I have developed over the years with women all over the world because of MOPS have changed my life. When my husband was deployed, the local group brought meals and offered friendship. The ones far away sent emails and cards (sometimes even with cash because they knew money was tight). When communication was down and I hadn’t heard from my Soldier in days, they were there to listen and to pray.

So how will you make a connection? Take that step and say hello. Exchange numbers. Have a girl’s night out. Are you a mom? There might be a MOPS group on your Post. Start building community where you are today. I am so thankful that I took that first step and walked into a MOPS meeting. You will be too.

For more from Army Wife Network, check out their website at http://www.armywifenetwork.com/

Athena Goldinger Hall
Army Wife and mom to six Army Brats

Army Wife Network - Pre Deployment.. AKA His Brain Has Left the Building - June 2010

Deployment is hard. I know that. I have experienced the pain of separation and frustration of not knowing when (or if) he is coming home. However, if I can be honest for just a minute, I have to admit that for me, pre-deployment is even harder.

The months and days of knowing that orders are coming, but not knowing exactly when, of trying to plan life around the what-ifs and maybes. My Soldier’s unit is leaving “sometime this year”. It could be anytime from May to September and he (read: we) has to be ready. Try explaining that to six kids and one mother-in-law (not to mention all the relatives and friends that don’t get it).

If you have been through deployment, then you understand that his head leaves before his body. The mission takes over their brains long before boots hit the ground. That leaves the biggest challenge of pre-deployment: trying to keep your Soldier involved as part of the family.

How do we do that? How can we encourage him to get down and play with the kids instead of repacking his bag for the 10th time? How can we make memories and plan for all the details of him being gone? How can we get everything done that needs to be accomplished? For our family, it means lots of planning, lists and intentionality on my part.

For example, one of my goals before he leaves is to have new family photos. We had our last baby 2 ½ years ago and we still don’t have a family picture with her in it. If I want that perfect shot to hang on the wall while he is gone, then I need to plan ahead to get it done. It goes on my Must Do List, along with updating the power of attorney and our wills (we haven’t done that since the baby either…). To me, it is just as important.

Then there are the things that I would like to see happen before he goes, such as painting the house and re-seeding the yard. Of course, these are things that I could -if you know me, please don’t gasp out loud- handle on my own. Or at least, hire someone to do while he is in the sandbox. These things go on my Wish List. This is the list of things that I have to be willing to let go when something else comes up.

Family time is always important, but it is vital to us during pre-deployment. It doesn’t just happen though; we have to plan it. Our family sets aside one night a week when everyone has to be home (not an easy task with two teenagers!). Family nights vary from a holiday devotional to coffee at Starbucks or a silly movie, but we are always together. Cell phones are not allowed, not even for the grown-ups. Our kids may grumble, but I know they won’t forget these times.

I know with all the details, there is never enough time, but don’t forget to spend alone time with your Soldier. You need to bank all the extra time together that you can. Army deployments are long and they can drain even the best relationships. Plan date nights (again without the cell phones) and enjoy being a couple.

Nothing will ever be perfect for deployment and I know that we won’t ever ‘be’ ready, but the last thing I want my kids to remember was that dad was so busy, that he didn’t have time for them. If I want the days and months leading up to his departure to be filled with fun memories, then I have to be intentional with my planning, learn to relax my expectations and live in the moment.

For more from Army Wife Network, check out their website at http://www.armywifenetwork.com/

Athena Goldinger Hall
Army Wife and mom to six Army Brats

Army Wife Network - Beating the Deployment Blues - March 2010

Being a military wife isn’t easy. Long hours and even longer deployments, constant moves… We make adjustments and soldier on, but that doesn’t mean the stress doesn’t affect us.

According to a recent study done by the University of North Carolina, wives whose husbands deployed for more than 11 months are 24 percent more likely to be diagnosed with depression or anxiety and 40 percent more likely to be diagnosed with acute stress or sleep problems than those whose husbands stayed home.

So how can we beat the statistics? We have to be intentional about taking care of ourselves. Here are some tips and ideas for beating the deployment blues:

Eat Healthy

No one wants to cook for one and the kids just want macaroni and cheese, again. But resist the urge to have a bowl of cereal for dinner tonight. While not a cure for depression, eating a balanced diet can help you feel better. WebMD says that getting the daily value of Vitamin D (600 IU) increases the serotonin level in your brain and high protein foods, such as tuna, increase the chemicals dopamine and norepinephrine, which can help you concentrate and boost your energy.

Get Moving

According to the Mayo Clinic, exercise is more than just good for your body; it is also good for your mind. Exercising releases ‘feel good’ chemicals called endorphins that help boost your mood and may help relieve depression. Get moving today by joining a class at the gym on post or putting the baby in the stroller and walking around the block. Double the benefits by inviting your neighbor to join you and make a new friend!

Exercise Your Mind

If we aren’t learning, we aren’t growing! Why not put the time while your Soldier is away to good use? Try taking a cooking or scrapbooking or even an automotive class. Read the latest bestseller and join a book club. Have you been thinking about going back to school? Put your husband’s GI Bill to work for you through transfer benefits. In addition to learning something new, it serves as a welcome distraction (you can only watch so many NCIS reruns on TV) and gets you out of the house.

Make Memories

Life doesn’t stop when deployment happens and you shouldn’t feel guilty about moving forward. When you have children, you can’t – and shouldn’t – put your family life on hold. Take time to make special memories with your kids. Of course, don’t forget to record those memories for your Soldier! Start new traditions. Special mom and me moments are something your kids will remember for a long time and will help them beat the deployment blues as well.

Get Out of the House

Don’t mope around in your pajamas. Get dressed and get out of the house. If you ever needed a friend, now is the time! Have coffee or a girls’ night out with a friend. Short on friends? Time to make some new ones! Do you have little ones? Join a MOPS group where there are others who understand what you are going through. You don’t have to do this alone.

See Your Doctor

If you have symptoms that are affecting your ability to eat, sleep or enjoy life, make an appointment right away. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. You want to be your best when your Soldier comes home, so take care of yourself today.

In the book What Every Mom Needs, author Elisa Morgan compares mothering to the pre-flight instruction to affix your oxygen mask first, before assisting others. In essence, you have to recognize your own needs and take care of yourself, before you can care for others. Don’t let the deployment blues get the best of you. Invest time into taking care of yourself and meeting your needs. You will be a better mom and wife for it.

Athena Goldinger Hall
Army Wife and mom to six Army Brats

Links for further information:

Web MD: Diet for Depression – http://www.webmd.com/depression/guide/diet-recovery

Mayo Clinic: Depression and anxiety: Exercise eases symptoms – http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/depression-and-exercise/MH00043

Department of Veterans Affairs: GI Bill – http://gibill.va.gov/

Mothers of Preschoolers: Find a Group – www.MOPS.org/groups

Tricare Mental Health – http://tricare.mil/mentalhealth/  

Pre-Deployment - AKA His brain has left the building...

If you are a military spouse, you totally understand that their brains forward deploy long before they even get on the plane :)

Check out my new article on pre-deployment at Army Wife Network!

Love,